Miss World Kaiane Aldorino given a rapturous welcome home to Gibraltar

Gibraltar gave a rapturous 'welcome home' to Kaiane Aldorino, Miss Gibraltar yesterday afternoon, following her spectacular crowning as our very own Miss World, at the glittering beauty pageant finale in Johannesburg South Africa, last Saturday!

In scenes reminiscent of the returns to Gibraltar of Sir Joshua Hassan and Sir Peter Isola, following their visits in the 60's to the United Nations, thousands turned out to welcome back this triumphal daughter of Gibraltar, now crowned as the most beautiful woman in the world... Gibraltar's own Miss World!

Today's Gibraltar Chronicle reports that Gibraltar came to a buzzing standstill yesterday afternoon, showered in red and white, and bathed in sunshine, to welcome Miss World 2009 Kaiane Aldorino back home.

There were unprecedented scenes of jubilation of enormous magnitude, with an entire population wanting to join in this once in a lifetime celebration, wanting to be a part of history – not just local but world history.

On Main Street the crowds were three and four lines deep, with flags unfurled, and confetti hurled high into the air. In John Mackintosh Square the scene was simply unbelievable – standing shoulder to shoulder Gibraltarians jam-packed in the square rocked in cheer. The Spanish press itself cited some 15,000 people.

There was an uproar of elation as the most beautiful girl in the world stepped on to the balcony at the City Hall.

The sentiment was warm, heartfelt and sheer delight. ‘I love Gibraltar,” cried an emotional Miss World. The rapturous cheers were deafening. The pouring of emotion, - of hopes, aspirations and dreams come true was overwhelming.

As humble as ever, she added, “If I was a proud Gibraltarian before, I am even prouder now, and proud to be here with everyone – thank you all for all your support.”

GBC Television 'Live' video

Gibraltar's local televiion channel, GBC TV, covered Kaiane's arrival live and has made the footage available via 'Livestream':

Watch live streaming video from gbctelevision at livestream.com

"Proud to be your ambassador"

As the champagne flowed and Kaiane made a toast, her family joined her on the balcony and she proudly introduced them… and again she addressed the crowds:

"This is a dream come true and I would not be feeling half of what I am feeling inside, if it was not for you. It is a day for all of us. I am proud to be your ambassador!"

As everyone sang, rocked and cheered to ‘We are the Champions’ – the feeling was one of euphoria.

Steve Douglas, Miss World Event Director, in disbelief at the scenes he was witnessing declared:

"I have taken many Miss Worlds home but we have never had a welcome like Gibraltar – never did we expect this – what a beautiful, beautiful country!"

He announced that during her reign she would be travelling to more than 50 countries, and that she would tell the world about Gibraltar.

Still taken in by the moment, he said:

"It was our job to bring your daughter home, the daughter of Gibraltar, to celebrate with the whole country!"

As Culture Minister Edwin Reyes joined her on the balcony he proclaimed:

"Kaiane, you will always be in our hearts!"

As the crowds clapped to the beat of Queen’s ‘We Will Rock You’, Miss World joined in raising her arms with the whole population in triumph – this was definitely her day! And Gibraltar’s!

Miss World Welcomed by Chief Minister

On arrival at Gibraltar Airport, flown in by a private jet chartered by the Gibraltar Government, it was Chief Minister Peter Caruana who first greeted her with a warm Gibraltarian embrace, the embrace that all of Gibraltar wanted to give Kaiane. As he welcomed her he handed her a bouquet of red and white roses. Also there to greet her was Mrs Caruana, and Culture Minister Edwin Reyes and Mrs Reyes.

Kaiane's joy was evident and it was clear it was her family who she was keen to see. Her mother, her father and especially her sister Noelle, who had not seen her since before she left for the Miss World contest, burst into tears on seeing her.

A few hundred people had also gathered at the specially prepared area of the tarmac, to be there and witness this special moment. Standing behind a barrier, along with hordes of press photographers, the first cheer came as they saw the jet for the first time. The cries went up a notch as she stepped onto the red carpet from the Gibjet which had brought her back home. Security was very tight and all awaiting her had to go through security as if they were boarding a flight.

The jet circled the runway to the sounds of the Fire Defence Service fire engine sirens following it, adorned with Gibraltar flags. Co-piloted by Gibraltarian Mark Carreras the plane came to a standstill in front of the iconic image of The Rock of Gibraltar, as Miss World appeared, dressed in a black suit wearing the Miss World Crown, she was greeted to the sounds of a fanfare by the buglers and a piper of the Royal Gibraltar Regiment. It was Gerry Fortuna on the bagpipes who serenaded her to the sounds of ‘Los llanitos son asi’.

Speaking at the Gibraltar Airport on her arrival, Chief Minister Peter Caruana, boldly and proudly stated:

"Gibraltar has two Queens, Her Majesty The Queen, and Kaiane Aldorino!"

The Chief Minister excitedly added:

"This breaks all records, and we are all very proud of this global achievement. She will prove to be a wonderful ambassador for Gibraltar and for the Miss World Organisation!"

Speaking to The Chronicle reporter, Kaiane said:

"I am just feeling great. I can’t wait to see what has been planned!"

Her Miss World title, she confessed, "was just beginning to sink in".

Unprecedented Scenes

Following a brief moment with her family and a change of dress, now in a smart red suit and her Miss World Crown, Kaiane was driven past Winston Churchill Avenue adorned with Gibraltar flags and Gibraltar Chronicle posters, and a large banner on the bridge which read ‘welcome home Kaiane – Miss World 2009’, people lining the streets in pockets along the way.

The scene awaiting Kaiane in Main Street were "beyond anyone’s wildest imagination" reports the Chronicle.

Miss World was transferred to the same car that paraded the late Princess Diana and Prince Charles through Gibraltar’s streets during their controversial honeymoon visit to Gibraltar. The Triumph was driven by Odette Benatar, escorted by three RGP motorists, and led up Main Street by the band of the Royal Gibraltar Regiment.

As she entered through the Casemates Gates, the crowds erupted – as she entered Main Street through a specially created arch of red and white balloons – the tears of joy and cheers and cries of ‘Kaiane’, ‘Welcome Home’, could barely be heard above the general uproar.

From balconies, from windows, and all along the street Gibraltar flags were being waved frantically – there were people of all ages. This was the smiling face of Gibraltar, - the day we all wanted to treasure.

On the balcony of City Hall, Christian Santos, who organised the 'welcome', announced her arrival; "The reigning Miss World 2009, Our very own Kaiane Aldorino" and the gathered crowd of thousands went wild with cheers and applause.

Francis Chipolina sang the emotional Gibraltarian song ‘Llevame Donde Naci’ (Take me where I was born) and tenor Nathan Payas also performed the Gibraltar National Anthem ‘Gibraltar, Gibraltar’, and the crowd joined in and sang along.

The cheers and cries of the people as Gibraltar’s beauty queen stepped on to the balcony to greet her people was deafening. In a cloud of confetti and streamers, and flags waving, she waved to everyone with a radiant smile. Again and again she moved across the balcony making sure everyone saw her – as they shouted “guapa!”, “well done Kaiane”, “Kaiane, Kaiane, we love you!”

'A Model of Consistency'

Chief Minister Peter Caruana yesterday declared that Kaiane in a very short period of time had transformed the sentiment and emotion of her entire fellow citizens.

"It is difficult to imagine that any single Gibraltarian can ever have a greater effect on the sentiment of the entire country, as Kaiane has had on the people of Gibraltar in the last few days, and today in particular."

Mr Caruana made these comments at the opening of the Press Conference at the Rock Hotel.

"We are unspeakably proud and happy that our own Miss Gibraltar has been able to triumph stunningly in South Africa and is now the reigning Miss World," he stated, describing her as "the most beautiful flower in the world".

"We entrust her to the Miss World Organisers," he added assuring that the Government of Gibraltar would give her and her family any support necessary throughout her reign.

"The Miss World Organisation has now seen how special she is to us all, they have seen what Gibraltar feels towards her, so they know that they are going to have to look after something very precious to lots and lots of people."

Mr Caruana said he had no doubt that she would be an equally successful ambassador for Miss World and for Gibraltar.

Steve Douglas on behalf of the Miss World spoke of the emotional roller coaster the experience had so far been for Kaiane.

He emphasised she had been a model of consistency in everything she had done.

"She has a wonderful way of expressing herself, and making everyone around her feel that they are special. That impressed the judges, and we feel she is going to be a fantastic Miss World!"

Addressing the press (live on Radio Gibraltar), Miss World was obviously content to be back home.

"To see my family, to see all my loved ones, my friends, my community, I am just really happy to be back!"

She admitted she had never expected the support or how Gibraltar had welcomed her with open arms. "I will treasure it forever," she said.

Asked if she now believed that she was really Miss World, she said:

"I should start believing it now because the whole of Gibraltar believes it. Seeing how proud Gibraltar is has given me the motivation and encouragement to do more, and I am truly looking forward to the year ahead."

Her travels begin in January when she heads for Asia beginning with Japan, Korea and Vietnam.

She stated that when she travels the world she will take everything about Gibraltar, "what can I leave behind?" she asked.

Mr Douglas emphasised that this was important year for the Miss World Organisation as it headed towards its 60th anniversary, and continued its charity work and brought to realisation the Miss World motto "beauty with a purpose".

Acknowledgement

I am indebted to David Parody who very kindly provided these great images of Kaiane Aldorino, Miss Gibraltar and Miss World 2009.

Photo © DM Parody (http://dotcom.gi/photos).

More of David's great images of Miss Gibraltar (now Miss World) can be seen on his Flickr channel and on the Facebook Group - Kaiane Aldorino, Miss Gibraltar & Miss World 2009

Gibraltar prepares a lavish 'welcome home' for our very own Miss World.... Kaiane Aldorino

The Gibraltar Government have now announced plans for welcoming home OUR Miss World, Gibraltar’s very own Kaiane Aldorino!

Plans for her arrival and 'Welcome Home' tomorrow afternoon, Thursday 17th Dec, are now complete, as was confirmed by a Government announcement earlier.

Miss World... Kaiane Aldorino, will arrive at Gibraltar Airport at 4 pm on a private jet chartered by the Gibraltar Government.

In a press release yesterday, the Government announced that Ms Aldorino will be met by the Chief Minister, Peter Caruana and members of her immediate family.

Members of the public are invited to greet her from a special enclosure being prepared on the airfield next to where the aircraft will park. People wishing to attend at the airport must arrive at the terminal by 3.30 pm at the very latest, as they need to be bussed out to the airfield.

At 4.45 pm Kaiane will parade through Main Street, from Casemates Square to Cathedral Square in (weather permitting) an open-top car. Should the weather be inclement, a different car will be used.

At 5.30 pm Kaiane is scheduled to appear on the balcony of City Hall to receive the acclamation of her very proud fellow citizens.

Francis Chipolina will sing “Llevame donde naci” and Nathan Payas will sing the “Gibraltar Anthem” from the City Hall Balcony.

In the evening, Mr Caruana will host a reception in Kaiane’s honour attended principally by her extended family and circle of friends, Miss Gibraltar contest organisers and helpers, and previous Miss Gibraltar winners.

There will be a fireworks display from Detached Mole at 8 pm to "mark Kaiane’s stunning achievement for herself and for Gibraltar", said the Government press release.

The Government has also arranged for thousands of Gibraltar flags and
confetti to be made available for use during the parade. These will be distributed, free of charge to the public, as from 2 pm on Thursday at the following places: Grand Parade, Waterport Road (opposite Water Gardens) and Casemates Square.

The Government said they will release all Government non-essential employees on Thursday at 3.30pm to enable them to attend the Miss World home-coming. It requested all businesses in Gibraltar "who are reasonably able to do so", to close on Thursday between 4 pm and 6 pm to allow their staff to take part in this very happy and proud occasion for Gibraltar.

The Chamber of Commerce has already urged businesses to release as many employees as possible but backs shops remaining open in the critical leadup to Christmas.

If the street celebrations that greeted Kaiane's winning of the Miss World contest are anything to go by... it's going to be a ball!!

Jesus is watching you!

Here's a good joke... just received in my Inbox this afternoon, to break the monotony of your Monday... in case you need it!

A burglar broke into a house one night. He shone his flashlight around... looking for valuables, when a voice in the dark said; "Jesus knows you're here!!"

The burglar nearly jumped out of his skin... clicked his flashlight off... and froze!

When he heard nothing more... after a bit... he shook his head and continued.

Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires... clear as a bell he heard the voice again: "Jesus is watching you!"

Freaked out... he shined his light around frantically... looking for the source of the voice.

Finally, in the corner of the room his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot!!

"Did you just say that? he hissed at the parrot.

"Yep", the parrot confessed, then he squawked;

"I'm just trying to warn you... that HE IS is watching you!"

The burglar relaxed and replied:

"Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?"

"I'm Moses", replied the bird!

"Moses?", the burglar laughed.

"What kind of people would name a bird Moses?"

The parrot replied.. nodding towards the corner of the room;

"The kind of people that would name a Rottweiler Jesus!!"

Miss Gibraltar Kaiane Aldorino crowned Miss World 2009

In a remarkable and historic turn of events for Gibraltar, Kaiane Aldorino, who was elected Miss Gibraltar 2009 back in June this year, was last night crowned as the new Miss World in a glittering two-hour global beauty pageant celebrated in Johannesburg, South Africa yesterday.

Dressed in a white-lace evening gown, our very own and statuesque Kaiane, who is 23 years old and works as an HR administrative clerk, had earlier won the swimsuit award and was an early crowd favourite.

At the moment that Kaiane was offered this most-sought-after crown by Kseniasukhi Nova, the Miss World 2008, of Russia and during the celebration that ensued, Kaiane was showered by silver confetti onstage. When her name was announced as the winner, she clapped her hands to her mouth saying; "I have no words!" (Watch YouTube Video below)

Later, when asked to describe her feelings, she said; "I am really happy!"

The crowd was rooting for her since the moment she won the swimsuit competition. She beat seven other contestants in the final round of the show to lift the crown.

Completing her 'court' are Miss Mexico, Perla Beltran Acosta, as First Runner-up and Miss South Africa, Tatum Keshwar, representing the host country, who was also very popular and was elected as Second Runner-up.

Like other prestigious title winners in the past, Kaiane did not talk about her immediate future plans. When interviewed later, Kaiane, wearing her crown of tiny jeweled blue flowers, said she had been impressed with South Africa, which was hosting its seventh Miss World final. Kaiane said:

"I will try to do the best that I can now that I have opportunity and advantage!"

Tearfully, she added:

"Thank you South Africa, this is the most wonderful moment of my life!"

Gibraltar bursts into spontaneous celebration

The show was seen by millions world wide and was televised live in Gibraltar. As result was announced, the news literally rocked Gibraltar!

In their traditional manner on major news moments such as this undoubtedly was, Gibraltarians took to the streets in celebration, following Kaiane's remarkable achievement... which puts Gibraltar firmly in the world's focus in a very positive way.

In typical Llanito (Gibraltarian) tradition, many congregated around the Waterport roundabout, noisily celebrating the wonderful news, car horns blaring and Gibraltar flags waving everywhere.

The local Gibraltar Chronicle blasted out the 'breaking news' headline and historically announced the news saying "It’s a Red Letter Day for Gibraltar today!"

The Chronicle said Kaiane Aldorino, Miss Gibraltar, "has shot to the top and won the Miss World contest".

It reports that mobile telephones were blocked as people rushed to spread the news.

Chief Minister Peter Caruana excitedly said:

!It’s a wonderful achievement for her and for Gibraltar. She's a special lady who deserves her huge success. A Gibraltarian again puts Gibraltar on the map!

We'll give her a home coming fit for a queen! Congratulations to her and her family!"

Speaking from South Africa, the now Miss World, Kaiane Aldorino repeated her earlier statements to the press and told the Chronicle:

"I am extremely happy but I just have no words to explain how I feel! I am just so, so happy!"

Chief Minister Caruana spoke to Kaiane who told him she was desparate to get home and celebrate with all Gibraltar. He told her that no one had ever made Gibraltar prouder and congratulated on behalf of all the people.

Kaiane also spoke to the Minister for Culture Edwin Reyes, who had informed her of the Rock’s reaction to the news. She asked him to thank everyone in Gibraltar for their support. She said she felt very proud and that it made her feel even happier knowing that everyone in Gibraltar was feeling just as proud.

PDP Leader Keith Azopardi said:

"This a spectacular achievement made all the more important because it was on a truly global stage.

Kaiane has made us all proud and we wholeheartedly congratulate her. She will be a fantastic ambassador for Gibraltar during her tenure.

We had sent her a message of support before the finals and she has truly put Gibraltar on the map in the best way possible."

Miss England 'disappointed'

The ceremony was broadcast to an estimated one billion viewers around the world.

Among the disappointed contestants was Miss England, a 22 year old soldier in the Royal Anglian Regiment dubbed 'Combat Barbie' by the British media, who has served in Iraq, was granted leave from the military for the one-month tour of South Africa, where before the live broadcast the contestants competed in sports, a talent showcase and, of course, the swimsuit competition but she failed to make it through in the sports heat after spraining her ankle during training.

"I'm sad to say none of us UK girls made it through to the final round, but I never expected to even be here," she said adding:

"There are a few tears here backstage and some of the girls are not talking to anyone."

L/Cpl Hodge was drafted in to compete in the contest last month after the original Miss England winner Rachel Christie relinquished her title following her arrest over an alleged nightclub brawl.

But the soldier was magnanimous in defeat, praising Miss Aldorino. She said:

"I was so proud to represent England in Miss World in front of two billion viewers; I'm chuffed to bits for Miss Gibraltar, the winner.

She is a real natural beauty who wasn't expecting to win at all.

I've enjoyed every minute of it and looking forward to my six months' reign as Miss England when I get back, as I want to use my title to promote the British Army. Well done Gibraltar!"

Miss India, Pooja Chopra, a hot favourite with the flag-waving international crowd, was eliminated in the top 16 after winning the 'Beauty with a Purpose' title for her charity work.

India and Venezuela have produced the most Miss Worlds, with five titleholders each.

Facebook Groups

Much like the streets of Gibraltar, within minutes of the news, Gibraltarians on Facebook went mad with many comments of ecstatic congratulations, expressing joy and pride in Kaiane's fantastic and historic beauty pageant world win. Within hours quite a number of Facebook Groups had also been created.

Not unexpectedly in the circumstances, there's a 'fan' page for Kaiane Aldorino Miss World 2009

As a means of channeling Facebook's highly excited Gibraltarian hordes and the public's huge enthusiasm surrounding this remarkable event, there is already a call for A welcoming street party for our Miss World... not that Gibraltarians need much excuse for a good street party... but this is one of the best reasons I've heard in a long time... to have one!

Some other groups include a call for A Statue for Miss World - our Miss Gibraltar... and perhaps not unsurprisingly, but to my mind... a little over the top now (not a sentiment normally accorded to Gibraltarians... much! ha ha) some are asking for the Government to Create a national holiday for Kaiane Aldorino - MISS WORLD 2009!! Hmmm... does that mean just for her... (in which case I am wholy in favour) or is this intended for the whole of the working population and school children?? Gibraltarians are never slow in calling for a holiday... or indeed taking them! lol In this case... probably justified... especially as if they do organise the street party... the end result will probably turn out to be... by default... a 'national holiday' anyway!

Proud to be Gibraltarian

As always... but today especially, like ALL of Gibraltar, I am very proud to be a Gibraltarian!

My personal congratulations to a lovely lady... well done Kaiane! You have already done Gibraltar proud and I am very confident you shall continue to do so during your tenure as the most beautiful girl in the world!!

Que guapas son las Llanitas.... Ole, ole y ole!!

Video of Miss World 2009 Winner - Miss Gibraltar - Kaiane Aldorino



Acknowledgement

I am indebted to David Parody who very kindly provided the Gibraltar street celebration images.

Photo © DM Parody (http://dotcom.gi/photos).

More of David's great images of Miss Gibraltar (now Miss World) can be seen on his Flickr channel

Four Guardia Civil arrested in Gibraltar harbour following chase incident

According to media reports tonight, four Spanish 'Guardia Civil' officers were detained in Gibraltar earlier today, following an incident.

Gibraltar's Panorama is reporting that a Guardia Civil launch was chasing a Spanish fast boat in waters near Gibraltar. The pursuit continued into Gibraltar harbour and ended with both the fast boat and the Guardia Civil launch being grounded in Gibraltar port area by 'Harbour Views', late this evening.

Once on land, the two men on the fast launch raced for cover. The Guardia Civil rushed after them. Shots were heard, it is claimed.

The Guardia Civil officers were taken to Police HQ. Gibraltar police also arrested the two men on the fast launch and took them away. The two vessels have been seized.

The Gibraltar police said this was a 'very serious' incident.

Eyewitnesses claim that several shots were heard, but it was not clear how many and this report has not been confirmed.

Later this evening, the Guardia Civil officers were released after questioning and Spain's Interior Minister Alfredo Perez Rubalcaba telephoned Gibraltar's Chief Minister Peter Caruana and apologised for the incursion.

"Sr Rubalcaba called me personally tonight. He said that they deeply regretted the incident and apologised," Caruana said.

Last month, London's ambassador in Spain was obliged to make a public apology on November 20 after a Royal Navy unit based in Gibraltar was seen shooting at a buoy allegedly 'painted in the colours of the Spanish flag' during target practice.

The Spanish Government does not recognise the waters around the Rock, which are British Gibraltar Territorial Waters. But the Spanish have been arrested within the waters of the port itself, which the Spanish Government accept that these waters were ceded under the terms of the 1713 Treaty of Utrecht, Britain's legal title to the Rock.

God and the Archangel Gabriel create a paradise called Gibraltar... but...

God and the Archangel Gabriel were sitting on a cloud one day.

God said, "I know... let's create a Rock and call it Gibraltar!"

Gabriel took notes.

"We shall site it where it is warm in the summer but not too cold in the winter."

Gabriel scribbled away frantically.

"We'll make the people good natured, kind and tolerant of all races and religions" God boomed.

Gabriel replied, "Even the Jews and Muslims?"

"Yes. Even them" God replied nodding.

"We will place the Rock close to the ocean and sea, so that seafarers can stop and rest and mix with these lovely people. This Rock shall be beautiful with wild animals and flowers and in this Rock I want caves with stalagmites and stalactites that generations can see and enjoy."

Gabriel scribbled away.

"On their shores we shall create reefs and provide plentiful fish for food and enjoyment... And give them beaches with fine white sand and make sure they have clean seas."

At this point, Gabriel stopped taking notes and he looked up at his Master.

"Lord, why are you being so generous with these people?"

The Lord smiled. "Well, my son, I haven't told you yet who their neighbours are going to be!"

With thanks to Tommy for sharing this with me!

BBC News - UK 'sorry' for shooting at 'Spanish flag' buoy

According to BBC News, the UK has apologised to Spain after the Royal Navy used a buoy with the 'Spanish colours'... for target practice!

This is totally ridiculous! The Royal Navy has been using a flag like this, known as 'flag no 1', for target practice probably since Nelson's day... and certainly since long before I was in the Royal Navy.... and that's 30 years ago! Damn 'Sloppies' will whinge and complain about everything and anything in Gibraltar waters!

I've no idea why the UK is saying 'sorry'!! They should tell the Spanish to bugger off out of Gibraltar waters... and mind their own business!

It might help if the Spanish authorities learned about the International Flags Signal Code! They would see the flag in question, (shown on the Flags on the right), as used by the Royal Navy, the US Navy and NATO forces, which Spain is part of, includes what is known as 'Flag No 1'... which admittedly is very similar to the Spanish national flag... but is NOT the Spanish flag. It's just the flag representing the number 1! The Royal Navy use this for shooting target buoys, simply because of it's easy visibility!

Here's a video of HMS Scimitar, part of the Royal Navy's Gibraltar Squadron, being filmed retrieving the bouy after 'words' were exchanged with a unit of the Spanish Guardia Civil's Marine section:



One can see the buoy clearly in one of the sequences. It is obvious that this was NOT the Spanish national flag! The Spanish authorities are just intent on mischief... and 'winding up' the UK.

The UK should stop appeasing the Spanish... and all their whims... whingeing and complaints. What the UK should do is enforce the integrity of Gibraltar's territorial waters... in NO uncertain terms... before there is a serious incident!

In my Inbox today... Outsmart a woman... Are you kidding?

A man telephones his wife at home and says;

"Honey, I have been asked to fly to Canada with my boss and several of his friends for a fishing trip. We'll be gone for a long weekend. This is a good opportunity for me to get that promotion I've been wanting so could you please pack enough clothes for a 3 day weekend for me? Oh and also... would you get out my rod and tackle box from the attic?

We're leaving at 4:30 pm from the office and I will swing by the house to pick my things up.

Oh! And please can you pack my new navy blue silk pajamas...? Thanks honey!"

The wife thinks this all sounds a bit odd... but, being the good wife, she does exactly what her husband asked.

Following the long weekend the husband returned home... looking a little tired, but... otherwise, looking good. His wife welcomes him home and asks if he caught many fish?

He says, "Yes! Lots of Walleyes, some Bass and a few Pike!" But he added;

"Why didn't you pack my new blue silk pajamas like I asked you to do?"

You'll love the answer!



The wife replies, "I did pack them... they're in your tackle box!!"


The moral of this story?

Never... Never... Never... try to outsmart a woman!!!

A Friend's memories of Thor in Vegas

Finally... a new post from me!

My apologies to any and all who may have (doubtful) missed my occasional postings.... but I've been a little low... and frankly not been too inspired to post about anything!

Today though... I was minding my own business checking out my Facebook when an old friend fired up the chat and said hello! She told me that she just had to tell me what happened to her yesterday... when she picked her little boy up from school.

Many years ago... I happened to tell her this joke about the Norse God Thor. Well... it just so happened that yesterday after school, her little boy reminded her of it. On the way home from school her little boy was telling Mum about his school day and that he had really enjoyed learning about the vikings and their God Thor! He couldn't understand why she was in hysterics all the way home... thinking about the joke he had recalled in her mind!

My friend brought a warm feeling to me today... telling me about this funny incident and I thought I would share the old joke with you here!

So Thor gets bored with the Valkyries and Sif up in Valhalla and decides to come down to earth in disguise to get a little action.

He turns up in Vegas and shacks up with a real paragon of beauty - her only slight fault being a strong lisp but... with the body of an angel!

So... she and Thor spend a whole week in their hotel room. Eating, sleeping and making love alternately.... sex, sleep, sex, eat, sleep... lather, rinse, repeatedly. For a whole week!!

By the end of the week, Thor knows he's found a wonderful girl and decides to let her know the majesty of his true identity. He stands before her at the foot of the bed, summons the lovely but lispy lady to his hand, and proudly says, "You know... I have to tell you... I'm Thor!"

She looks at him sleepily and replies; "YOU'RE Thor??! I'm sow thor... I can't even pith!!!!"

Still makes me laugh!! I hope you enjoyed it too!

Kaiane Aldorino crowned Miss Gibraltar 2009

All glitz and glamour of a beauty pageant was in evidence last night as Kaiane Aldorino was crowned Miss Gibraltar 2009 at the Alameda Open Air Theatre.



A veritable bevy of beauties paraded their undoubted talents in this ever popular annual Gibraltar event.


Other prizes went to:

Maxine De La Rosa – 1st Princess

Jordana Lavagna – 2nd Princess

Jair Azzopardi – Miss Catwalk

Tyrene Navarro – Best Interview & Miss Photogenic

Elke Hanglin – Miss Friendship

Acknowledgement

I am indebted to David Parody who very kindly sent me these images. More of David's great pics of Miss Gibraltar can be seen on his Flickr channel

Photo © DM Parody (http://dotcom.gi/photos).

In my Inbox today... An ode to politics

An ode to politics

I want a floating duck house,
I want to clear my moat,
I need to mend my tennis court,
That’s why I need your vote.

I have to build a portico,
My swimming pool needs mending,
My lovely plants need horse manure,
And the Aga needs much tending.

A chandelier is vital,
Mock Tudor boards are great,
My hanging baskets won awards,
And I’ve earned a tax rebate.

I need a glitter toilet seat,
My piano so needs tuning,
Maltesers help me stay awake,
And my orchard must need pruning.

I could have said the rules were wrong,
And often thought I should,
But somehow it was easier,
To profit all I could.

The public really have to see,
That the rules are there to test
And by defrauding taxpayers,
We were just doing our best.

The Speaker of the House has gone,
Our sacrificial beast,
But the public are still praying,
For our corpses at the feast.

What do the public want from us,
Those vote-wielding ingrates?
They really should be grateful
to be financing our estates.

The message is so very clear,
(we’re merely learning late)
That the British way of living well
Is to screw the bloody state.

Celebrating Gibraltar's dishes... Summer beauties and various delectations

As Gibraltar moves inexorably into its Summer season, I note with sad regret that I missed the Calentita Evening at Casemates last week... which I gather went down a treat... as it would do!

The Calentita is generally regarded as Gibraltar's national dish.

The Gibraltar Heritage page about the Calentita talks of the diverse origins of the population of Gibraltar and quite rightly states that this is "illustrated in the local traditional dishes".

When many of our visitors first arrive in Gibraltar they assume that the traditional Gibraltarian meals are much the same as anything that can be found along the south coast of Spain – after all we are only a short distance away. However, a closer look at our traditional recipes soon illustrates that this is just not so.

Often said to be Gibraltar’s National Dish, the Calentita's popularity is not only the exclusive domain in homes across Gibraltar, it is often also on offer at many official Government receptions for visitors.

This dish originates in Genoa and Liguria in Italy, areas from where many Gibraltar family origins can be traced. It is a kind of thick pancake, easily made from chickpea flour, mixed with oil and water and baked in a hot oven. In Italy (and other parts of the world including South America) it is called Faina or Farinata and there is a French equivalent in Nice.

The name Calentita derives from the Spanish word for warm, as it is normally served straight out of the oven. In the past it was sold in the streets - the last Calentita vendor, Paloma, is still remembered locally (including yours truly) - although it was most commonly prepared at home by those who owned their own ovens.

Since I missed the one in Gibraltar last week, I'm planning our own Calentita evening for family and friends! You might like to try it out for yourself... here's the Calentita recipe... it really is delicious!

Botanic Gardens prepares for Miss Gibraltar Pageant

In an email press release I received from the Gibraltar Botanic Gardens, more commonly known as the Alameda Gardens, they're looking ahead to the next item on the Gibraltar Special Events Calendar... and the organising of the Miss Gibraltar Pageant which takes place at the Botanic Gardens' Alameda Open Air Theatre next Saturday.

At a time when Gibraltarian beauty is celebrated, they are reminding us of the natural beauty of the venue in the Gibraltar Botanic Gardens, which they report has been "transformed into an enchanted forest" by the set designed by Urban Dance's Illumina, written and choreographed for the Theatre, so "the natural beauty of summer flowers must be highlighted".

The Theatre pond itself boasts the best display of water lilies for many years.

Also flowering at the moment in the Alameda is the stunning Australian Flame Tree, which is in bloom for only the second time in its life, as it only burst into flaming colour every five years.

In flower too are white and pink Oleander, turquoise-blue Jacaranda, sparkling pink bottle brushes and Albizzia and pale blue Cape Chestnut.

Most of these flowering trees adorn the Upper Walk of the Gardens and the little secluded area known as The Dell. They stand out beautifully against the greens of the evergreen trees, contrasting with the dryness of the summer on the ground.

While Gibraltar enjoys the Miss Gibraltar Pageant next week, the Botanic Gardens ask us not to forget the natural colours and beauty than can be found, all year round, in Gibraltar's beautiful Botanic Gardens.

More photographs of most of these trees and other flowers can be found on the Gibraltar Botanic Garden website.

Update - Sunday 28th June 2009

You can see the result of the Miss Gibraltar pageant, including more images and links here

Bossano tells UN committee 'Spain is stuck in a time warp' on Gibraltar

Last week, at the United Nations Special Committee of 24 on Decolonisation hearing, the Special Committee took up the question of Gibraltar once again.

As usual, the representative of Spain opposed any attempt to remove Gibraltar from the list of Non-Self-Governing Territories undergoing decolonization, and reiterated the Spanish Government’s wish to renew "conversations" with the United Kingdom on the future of Gibraltar.

Reiterating Spain’s full commitment to the decolonization process, he stressed the particular prominence of the question of Gibraltar, which concerned two member States of the European Union and allies within the North Atlantic Treaty. The situation of Gibraltar undermined Spain’s "national unity and territorial integrity".

In reply, the Committee also heard from Joe Bossano, the leader of Gibraltar's GSLP/Liberals Opposition parties who was a Petitioner for Gibraltar.

Now... I don't often agree with Mr Bossano... in fact, very rarely... but I have to say, in the speech he gave to the UN Committee hearing, he is spot on and I couldn't agree more with everything he says! In particular, I agree with him on the anachronistic 1713 Treaty of Utrecht, which to my mind should long ago have been consigned to the dustbin of history... and about Gibraltar's already established (the UK Government agreed this in 2007) de facto decolonisation of Gibraltar. Well done Joe... you old Walrus!

Mr Bossano, who turns 70 this month, said his hoped for ruling by the UN Committee of 24, accepting Gibraltar's decolonisation and removing it from the list of the 16 remaining Non-Self-Governing Territories, would be the best birthday present he would have ever received. I do wish they would grant him his wish... and Gibraltar its own aspirations!

The Leader of the Opposition Joe Bossano, said that in terms of the Territory’s decolonisation, Spain was "stuck in a time warp", expecting Gibraltarians to accept that their rights as a people should be measured by the yardstick of the Europe that had existed in 1713 rather than by the human rights values of 2009. Spain had used the spurious claim that a territorial dispute doctrine invented by the Special Committee overrode the United Nations Charter, the Universal Declaration of Human Rights, covenants on political and social rights and long-established international jurisprudence on decolonization and self-determination.

This year, instead of demonstrating respect and support, Spain had challenged the sovereignty of Gibraltar’s territorial waters, he said. Spain’s position that Gibraltar could not have territorial waters, which were not provided for under the 1713 Treaty of Utrecht, was wrong under international law. In the past, Spain had respected Gibraltar’s territorial waters on the median line in the Bay of Gibraltar and the three miles off the coast, including the zone adjacent to the isthmus not covered by the Treaty. It had not attempted to apply Spanish law to vessels anchored in those areas.

Spain had previously demarcated the flight paths over Gibraltar’s waters to and from the local airport, which were followed by aircraft not permitted to use Spanish airspace, he noted. This year, however, Spain had claimed responsibility for the environmental protection of Gibraltar’s waters, which it had been unable to deliver. Spain had also made a number of incursions into Gibraltar’s territorial jurisdiction, forcing the United Kingdom, as the administering Power, to take action to protect the sovereignty of Gibraltar’s waters, as required by the Territory’s Constitution.

He said that, having accepted that Gibraltarians were a separate people from those of the administering Power, as required by resolution 1541 (XV) principle (IV), it was not for the Special Committee to arbitrate, mandate or establish a doctrine as to the appropriate relevant monarch for Gibraltar. The monarch’s identity was irrelevant for the purpose of eradicating colonialism. Decolonization could only happen when the peoples of the Territories’ exercised self-determination. Without the Gibraltarians, there would be no colonial relationship to correct, but only an uninhabited piece of land subject to a territorial dispute.

He said Spain had used false arguments to pursue its case, relying on the natural special relationship it enjoyed with some of its former colonies for support. The Special Committee’s Spanish-speaking members should acknowledge and accept that they had more in common with Gibraltar than with Spain in terms of commitment to decolonization and the right to self-determination, regardless of Hispanic cultural affinity. The Special Committee should conduct an assessment of the constitutional changes in Gibraltar, in line with its duty to monitor progress in the Territories towards self-government. The United Kingdom had claimed that Gibraltar’s new Constitution made for a non-colonial relationship with the United Kingdom; the Special Committee’s report to the Fourth Committee should comment on that change instead of once again deferring the matter for another year.

Noting Spain’s position that Gibraltar should revert to Spanish rule while retaining all the privileges it currently enjoyed as a Non-Self-Governing Territory under British rule, he said that flew in the face of the Special Committee’s decolonization mandate. Gibraltar would not cede to or share with Spain one inch of land, one drop of territorial water or any airspace whatsoever. The Special Committee should consider the question of Gibraltar as it would any other Non-Self-Governing Territory and not allow itself to be led astray by the misguided, self-serving arguments of Spain, whose sole objective was to replace the United Kingdom as administering Power.

You can hear the two speeches in full on this video:



Excellent... well said Joe!!

Frankly... whether the UN do the right thing or not... I really don't care. In my opinion, this Committee long ago lost any credibility on their genuine search for fairness and justice... but it would be nice if they did finally accept Gibraltar has been decolonised and removes us from the list of Non-Self-Governing Territories!!

In my Inbox today... Did you hear the one about the Bristol Zoo Car Park Attendant?

In my inbox today... the apparently true story and 'bit of a wheeze'... concerning a Car Park Attendant at Bristol Zoo.

An email currently circulating, tells the story as follows:

Outside Bristol Zoo, there is a car park for 150 cars and 8 coaches. It was manned by a very pleasant attendant with a ticket machine charging cars £1 and coaches £5. This parking attendant worked there solid for all of 25 years. Then one day... he just didn't turn up for work!

"Oh well", said Bristol Zoo Management, "we'd better phone up the City Council and get them to send a new parking attendant..."

"Err no", said the Council, "that car park is your responsibility"...

"Err no", said Bristol Zoo Management, "the attendant was employed by the City Council... wasn't he?"

"Err NO!"

Sitting in his villa in Spain, is a bloke who had been taking the car park fees, estimated at £400 per day at Bristol Zoo for the last 25 years!!

Assuming 7 days week, this amounts to just over £3.6 million... Fanbloodytastic!!

Nice story huh? Would that it were true! Unfortunately... it isn't!

According to snopes.com, this tale is "purely the stuff of fiction rather than fact".

The Bristol Zoo says it has never experienced any confusion over parking attendants, and that it has several attendants and more than one car park, none open to coaches. Moreover, in response to Snopes.com inquiries about the tale, a Bristol Zoo representative said:

We have had numerous similar enquiries lately but I can assure you that this rumour is not true.

A version of this story also appeared in the Bristol Evening Post back in 2007 but it was as part of a feature on urban myths published to coincide with April Fool's Day, not as a reporting of a real-life event.

Sad... I'd like it to have been true!

Bristol Zoo

Bristol Zoo Gardens is a 12 acre site in Clifton that is run by the The Bristol, Clifton and West of England Zoological Society Ltd.

Awarded ‘Zoo of the Year 2004’ by the Good Britain Guide, Bristol Zoo Gardens has a continuous reputation for excellence, innovation, and dedication to conservation. It’s the fifth oldest zoo in the world and the oldest outside of a capital city, and a long established major tourist attraction in Bristol.

There's no such thing as bad publicity! I bet though... that the carpark attendants at Bristol Zoo these days... are absolutely fed up of being asked... if they work for the Council, the Zoo... or themselves!!

Gibraltar European Parliament Election results announced

The Gibraltar Chronicle has just reported the result of the Gibraltar European Elections 2009.

Local Returning Officer Melvyn Farrell declared the Conservative Party has secured majority support from Gibraltar voters in this year’s European elections, obtaining 51.93% of the votes on a disappointingly low turnout.

The Labour Party achieved the second-largest number of votes with 18.53% with the Liberal Democrats, which included Gibraltarian Jonathan Stagnetto in its lineup, coming a close third in the count with 17.71% of Gibraltar votes.

Low Turnout for Gibraltar

Just 7,166 Gibraltar voters cast their ballots in the election this year, representing only 35% of the electorate. This percentage turnout is below the turnout of 39% in the EU Constituency of the South West region, (which includes Gibraltar and the Scilly Isles), as a whole. The figure is also well below voting turnout in 2004, the first time that Gibraltar participated in European Parliament elections. That year, Gibraltar’s turnout was far higher at nearly 58%, well above the EU average.

Read more on the Gibraltar European Election 2009 result here.

In my Inbox today... How SOME men amuse themselves Tesco Shopping!

In my Inbox today... proof of what can happen if a wife or girlfriend drags her husband or boyfriend along shopping!

This letter was actually (apparently) sent by Tesco's Head Office to a customer in Oxford :

Dear Mrs. Murray,

Whilst we would like to thank you for your valued custom and use of the Tesco Loyalty Card, the Manager of our store in Banbury is considering banning you and your family from shopping with us, unless your husband stops his antics.

Below is a list of his actions over the past few months all verified by our surveillance cameras:

1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's trolleys when they weren't looking.

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5 minute intervals.

3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to feminine products aisle.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares... and watched what happened.

5. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

6. September 15: Set up a tent in the outdoor clothing department and told shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring sausages and a Calorgas stove.

7. September 23: When the Deputy Manager asked if she could help him, he began to cry and asked, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'

8.. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a mirror, picked his nose, and ate it.

9. October 10: While appearing to be choosing kitchen knives in the Housewares aisle asked an assistant if he knew where the antidepressants were.

10. November 3: Darted around the store suspiciously, loudly humming the Mission Impossible' theme.

11.November 6: In the kitchenware aisle, practised the 'Madonna look' using different size funnels.

12. November 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed, yelled' PICK ME!' 'PICK ME!'

13. November 21: When an announcement came over the loudspeaker, assumed the foetal position and screamed 'NO! NO! It's those voices again.'

And; last, but not least:

14. November 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited a while; then yelled, very loudly, 'There is no toilet paper in here.